The Naughty Boys of Chungking

Chungking is a word that sends shivers down the spines of most people in HK. Chungking Mansions is inarguably the most infamous and dingy place in Hong Kong. Almost all the inhabitants of this seedy building are people originally from Indian and African subcontinents. Well, they live like a boss. To hell with embracing the local culture of HK; to hell with the rules; to hell with civic sense; to hell with rationality. Enter the building and you embrace absurdity with open arms.

I was one of the backpackers staying in one of the many guest houses here. People from Indian subcontinent speak Hindi/Punjabi so I could understand every word they said. They are hilarious. Even before you enter the building a couple of them try to sell you stuff you will never buy in life even if you are paid for it. As you enter the building many of them pounce on you with unattractive offers of dingy rooms, calling cards, extensions cables and can openers.

They are annoyingly persistent. Marketing lessons are for social retards. Logic is mere intellectual spool. They believe in policy of brute force. As you fight past them to reach the lift lobby, you bump into a queue of people. The amount of time it takes for the lift to come is long enough to turn them into zombies. As you enter the room you realize it's hardly bigger than the lift you were in a few seconds ago.

Sorry I digressed.

The people: 

The people here are VERY insulated from the rest of HK. They hardly do anything that carries a local influence. I used to go out in a very casual attire. It helped me blend in - they thought I was one of them and didn't hassle me. The downside - I couldn't talk at all to the fellow backpackers. They took me for one of the peddlers.

One day there were two Indian guys in the lift, one of them quite new in the city. He wanted to know where he could find white girls in the city for "boom boom". The other guy claimed innocence when he said, "मैं यह सब नहीं करता (I am not into such stuff)". The newcomer's reply was brilliant - "तुम बहुत सीधे हो, बंगाली हो क्या? (you are very naive. are you from Bengal?)". I brazenly burst out in front of them.

On my last night in Chungking, I wanted to see what goes on after-hours in the area. I dashed out of my tiny room in excitement at one in the morning and went to the ground floor, the hotspot of all naughtiness. A few "import-export" shops were still open along with a few internet kiosks. This was one time when I saw African people outnumber the people of my race. I took a roundabout route to the exit. There was police outside questioning an inhabitant - a pretty common occurrence. As I strode away from the exit, I saw an Indian guy still hassling all the passers-by to buy suits or watches. They'll never give up. I think such a thing has now ingrained in their blood. They never think consciously about what they are doing, what time it is, how can they improve/change things or why they are doing it.

A few steps ahead two guys were gawking at a woman in dodgy costume standing across the road. One of them said to the other, "वो तुझे देख रही है  (She's looking at you)". The face of the other guy lightened up as he fixated his gaze on her. I went ahead across the road where an African lady was squabbling with a convenience store owner loudly. The owner had apparently called the police who was trying to pacify the not-so-happy lady. I watched the scene for a few minutes when I got bored and decided to go back. En-route the main entrance, I saw the guy still standing there enamored by the lady in dodgy costume, still staring at her. 

In the lift, an African man was talking to someone recounting the incident of her friend having a brawl with a convenience store owner. I ask him why she was fighting with the guy. He said, "She was fighting with the person." I asked him why. He repeated the same thing. I grew a bit impatient. I raised my tone slightly and asked, "But why?" The guy apparently didn't like the rise in my pitch. He assumed a grave look and said in loud clear words to me, "... because this is Hong Kong, this is not your country." I could sense copious amount of hostility in the air. I said "OK good night" and ran to my room like a hare hopping into her lair. 

The decors:

The extreme inadequacy of elevators forces you to use stairs very often. The stairway is dingy and stinky. The walls are mottled with paan stains and other noisome stuff. There are two narrow alleys flanking the building. They are strong prototypes of a dystopian cityscape. They are choking on trash and the water dripping from above always keeps them wet and smudgy. It's much better inside the building, but the environment looks very sketchy. What's surprising is in spite of a large presence of Africans, there aren't many shops selling their goods whereas you can find every desi stuff from pirated CDs of kitschy Hindi movies to गृहशोभा here.

The positive non-negative side:

Not everything is bad about this place though. The place has got amazing Indian food at a very affordable price. The people at the reception were very hospitable and helpful to me. Not all of them are illegal immigrants. There have been reports of murder and rape in recent past but the place didn't look so unsafe to me. Security has been beefed up. It just has a very strong sketchy character. Certainly a lot of underhand dealings occur on a daily basis but they are not as insolent as some articles claim. I didn't come across anyone who tried to sell me drugs or other dodgy stuff. But would I like to go there again? Probably just for the food. 

[This place has been mentioned in various well known magazines and websites like Time and CNN. It's shady dealings and sketchy character was shown remarkably intact in a very well made movie 'Chungking Express'. Watch the movie if you haven't yet.]

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Govind Nihalani: An unsung hero of Indian Cinema

A majority of movies that Indian cinema churns out are just pathetic. Many of them are stereotypical flicks which only tow the line. Most superstars rise to fame with movies that employ little more than tawdry action sequences and threadbare dialogues. There is a huge audience for such movies, and the movie makers happily pander to the demand. 

Mani Ratnam and Anurag Kashyap are some of the few names that shine in the dust. But there is one person - extremely talented - whose entire array of movies is adorned by nominations for, and in most cases has been awarded, the prestigious National Film Award, and yet is an unknown name to most people. The guy's name is Govind Nihalani.

It really appalling how such a great movie maker is unknown to most people of this country. I do prefer non-masala flicks and generally rely on nominations for National Film Awards to know about the good movies which the audience doesn't care to appreciate. And that's how I bumped into his name. 

His movies are a bold slap on malfunctioning and corrupt Indian machinery and the ills of society. He gifted us gems like Aakrosh, Ardh Satya and Tamas. Almost every film of his has won at least one National Award. After a hiatus of about ten years he came back with Hazaar Chauraasi Ki Maa which, again, won a National Award. And this was the time when Directorate of Film Festivals used to put a genuine effort to recognize and award good movies (last time I heard a farcical movie named Dabangg was given this prestigious award). Even his lesser known movies have something daring, visionary and innovative. 

This is a tribute to a man truly ahead of his time. 

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वो ...

वो माया से विरक्त था, वो रुका हुआ वक़्त था
वो पल जो कोई पल न था, जहाँ का कोई कल न था
वहां कोई दिशा न थी, उषा न थी निशा न थी
न मुझे कोई प्यास थी, न किसी की तलाश थी
वो भूत था भविष्य था, वो एकता का शिष्य था
..
..

वो निर्जीव न था, उसके हर अंश में प्रान था
वो यथार्थ न था, वो एक स्वप्न का वितान था

वहां गुरुत्व न था, किसी कोटि का अनुमान न था
कोई अभाव न था, किसी अभिलाषा का प्रमान न था

वो समय न था, वो हर बिंदु पर समान था
न भूत न भविष्य, बस दीर्घ वर्तमान था

वो मौलिक थे, मेरी कल्पना के पात्र नहीं थे
हम उसके अवियोज्य अंश थे, अतिथि मात्र नहीं थे

न कोई ध्येय था न कोई राह थी
मैं था तुम थे फिर क्या परवाह थी

मैं मैं न था तुम तुम न थे 
वो हम न थे वो कोई और थे

हम हम न थे हम कोई और थे
वो हम न थे वो कोई और थे

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चेतना और स्वप्न

पवन-गत रजनी में
हरी घास पर लेट कर
उस विराट अंतरिक्ष की गहराईयों में
मैंने जब अपनी चेतना को खोया है,
मैं भूल गया हूँ अपनी काया की परिधियों को;
और समय की परिधिओं को भेद कर
मैंने देखा है तारों को आपस में बात करते हुए;
..

..

और कभी कभी
हवा की फुसफुसाहट के बीच
मैंने सुने हैं वो स्वर मेरे अतीत से आते हुए|

 

आकाश के गहरे अन्धकार में मैंने देखा है
एक काली परछाई से धुंधले और अपूर्ण
 उन चेहरों को मेरी ओर मुस्कुराते हुए ;
और जब जब मैंने माँगा है उनका परिचय
एक रहस्यमयी हँसी के साथ,
और फिर आने के वादे के साथ
वो विलुप्त हो गए हैं| 

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Quirky Crackpots

[This post arises from the stark realization - इस धरती पर ऐसे लोग भी हो सकते हैं | This place is blessed with some awesome, quirky, cranky and freaky people with unsolicited and unavoidable bouts of insanity. And hence this post.]

Some clues to the inordinate insanity pervading this place-

Instance 1:
Me (to Pondy): Abe, pata hai *** kya bol raha tha aaj
Pondy: Kya?
Me: Jaisa wo har sem se pehle bolta hai - yaar, is sem mein bahut load tha. Agle sem mein sab theek chala to pakka do teen bandiyon ko thokunga.

Pondy gets excited over the idea, and approaches Baniya anxiously.

Pondy (to Baniya): Abe sun *** kya bol raha tha
Baniya: Kya?
Pondy: Agle sem mein sab theek chala to pakka do din Baniye ko thokunga.
Baniya faints.

Instance 2:
Baniya (at some treat, expressing how staunch a veg he is): Abe us chammach se mat le... main bahut zyada vegetarian hoon.

Instance 3:
(Eve: Baniya's budday (April 1). His ass has been kicked too sore to walk easily.)
Slv: Aaj 1st April hai na.
Me: Haan. Aaj Baniya paida hua tha.
Slv: Haan, tabhi to nahi aaya class aaj.
Pondy: Haan, abhi to chalna bhi nahi aata hoga use.
(I know this is somewhat lame. But looking at it otherwise, it is crazy, particularly when Pondy says it.)

Instance 4:
This time it's me. The grogginess resulting from the stupor (which itself results from from intolerably boring classes) makes my hearing ability skewed. I begin hearing some beautiful things.
Prof: And we can see the image in scanning ... (waiting for students to complete '...electron microscope')
I hear (barely awake): And we can see her image in stunning ...
(My stupor wades off, senses activate. Before the chorus of students, am all awake. And after the chorus, when reality hits me, am all dejected.)

Instance 5:
(Occasion: Project presentation.)
A prof from the panel: What is the basic principle of lyophilizer?
[Let me tell you, lyophilizer is used to dry things - it sucks moisture.]
My fellow classmate: Sir... it sucks (then forgets what does it suck. So the final answer is - Sir, it sucks!!!)

And then there is the craziest person that came to earth - Gyan. He deserves a separate post for his antics.

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A gem from a Hindi poem

अक्सर आकाश गंगा की
सुनसान किरणों पर खड़े होकर
जब मैंने अथाह शून्य में
अनंत प्रदीप्त सूर्यों को
कोहरे की गुफाओं में
पंख टूटे जुगनुओ की तरह
रेंगते देखा है
तो मैं भयभीत होकर
लौट आई हूँ |
-धर्मवीर भारती

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